I used to believe so.
There is this documentary movie titled "Happiness". This movie tells about happiness, that there are two kinds of happiness, pseudo happiness and true happiness. We surely want the latter, right? But of course there are deceptions coming in the way of our pursuit of true happiness, in this form called pseudo happiness. This thing is something we might often think of what happiness looks like: money, fame, recognition. Many people chase it. Many people fight for it. I will not deny it, I might be happy too if I have it, but why do you think it is called pseudo happiness? Because they don't last long. It's kind of a trap. It's a trap, that many people climb the ladder thinking they will find happiness up there, but then after they get to the top, they still can't find what they're truly looking for. True happiness is not there.
Sure the sparks of joy are there, but only for a moment. Many people who have achieved those three things actually will feel a little bit empty inside, if their objective is not right on the track. And they would wonder, "Why?" After thinking about it for a while, it crossed my mind that it might be because they tend to achieve their goals only for themselves. All of these achievements are foods for our ego. The ones that make us only feel "higher", but not more humble.
Meanwhile, still from the documentary movie, it is said that true happiness comes from three things: benefiting others, high quality relationship, and self improvement. What I can figure out of this, is that two of the three things here involve other people. And I think, that is one clue of true happiness.
Now let's look at them one by one, from the other side.
First, when you get to benefit others, or give to those in need, or help someone and see the gratitude in their eyes, you will sense the happiness of being useful, the feel that you are here in this world for a reason. You will also be grateful when you realize that you have more, when you see others who have less than you, and you will actually be happy that you get to be the one who can change their lives. Money, is one of the things you can share, is one way to help people in need. The key here is, if you want to be happy, make others happy.
Second, when you have good relationship with others, you feel connected with those who you love and love you, you see their big heart, and you experience the art of "giving and never mind", you will sense the happiness of being not alone, the grateful feeling that you have someone to share your happiness with. Maybe Christopher McCandless put it best: "Happiness is only real, when shared." You can do all the things you want with money, things like traveling to the other side of the world, buying things, eating good food, and many more. But where's the fun in doing it alone by yourself? Even if you're having fun doing it alone, you still need friends to share the stories with. That's the good situations, let alone the bad ones. You'll need another shoulder to cry on. Imagine you're going through hard times and you have no one to rely on? Man, that's tough. Not to mention the matters of family. Ever imagine spending your retirement days all alone without kids and spouse? I can't. All of the good things you can do with your money, is way better spent with your loved ones. This proves that sometimes money can also raise the quality of your relationships.
Third, when you level up in any skill or any chapter of life, or when you feel you got better in some certain way, or when you achieve something that you thought as improvements, you will sense the happiness of satisfaction, the feeling that you have beaten yourself, that you have conquered your own fears, thankful for succeeding to make it through. Money can help you up with the process of making yourself "better". You can find the best mentor and pay him, or you can look for the best program and enroll, or you can also buy all the tools that you think can help you in improving yourself. Even though it is not used in all occasions, but money surely can help you with this.
So, yeah, money can make you do things number one, two, and three. If you're lucky, in some cases, money can also make you feel happy. However, in most cases, it could be tricky. It depends on how we use the money, and it isn't guaranteed that you will be happy. Why? Because no matter how you do all of those things trying to make yourself happy, it's nothing if you don't have gratitude. Notice the similarity of those three things is your reaction, your attitude towards those things. And best attitude is gratitude.
What money can't buy actually is the gratitude. Money can make you do those things, but it isn't guaranteed that you will be happy, because it doesn't guarantee you that it comes along with the gratefulness.
Happiness is actually simple. Up to this point, I still believe the key of happiness is gratitude. To be happy is essentially to be grateful, and to be frank, I don't think money can buy gratitude.
What's so tricky about happiness is that most of the times, most people get it mistaken. Many would think, if we are happy, then we should be grateful, while actually it is the other way around: it is the gratitude that makes us happy. Even more, research shows if we are brave enough to express our gratitude, we will feel happier.
After all, happiness is an inside job, you need no money to create happiness. True happiness is not there on top of the ladder. It is always alongside. All along. It is how we're being thankful of every process of climbing up, no matter how far we end up.
